Wednesday, November 2, 2011


Another year is over, and a new one just started. We once again stepped into the labyrinth, started the journey within and without again.
The past year has not been an easy one for me. I spent several months healing from yet another depression, and that was hard. still, I feel this time it was different in that I learnt to rcognize several triggers in myself, as well as symptoms Now that I recognize this it is easier for me to get to grips with my mind. I know now that a depression isn't in my head instantly, I kind of slide downwards. Now I recognize my early symptoms i can stop gliding dow and start working towards recovery ear;ier, without reaching the darkest depths.
I also learn some valuable things to do to stop me gliding down. I need to think about me, and not about everything and everyone else. I come first, and this is not a bad thing. If i don't tae care of me I am no good to anybody else either.This might have been the most important thing I have ever learnt, truly learnt......looking after myself does not make me a bad person.
This year I also experienced my first shamanistic ritual when I attended a sweat lodge ceremony at midsummer. After a second sweat lodge last weekend I now know I was resisting the healing a sweat lodge can bring. Because of this I was really ill after my first lodge. Last saturday I really felt my grieve and pain come out physically. My muscles clenched and I had to throw up. My respect and love goes out to the sweat lodge leader, because he helped me so much. He really broke my resistance and freed my from past pain. My respect and love as well for the people who tended the fire. One of them held me after I came out of the lodge and told me it was ok to lean on someone, I don't have to do it all by myself. This woman really touched my heart.....I hope that I will be able to follow the course she teaches next year, because I think she has much to tell and teach me.
This is it for the day. I hope you had a good Samhain celebration as well. Are there any specific lessons yo learned? Do you have any plans for the coming cycle?

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